Letting a man know you like him is a big deal for every girl.
However, when your infatuation consumes you completely yet this guy does not make any moves, you have no other choice but to take action.
Of course, you don’t necessarily have to confess your emotions straight up.
In fact, there are other bulletproof ways for you to show interest in him and advice on how to tell a guy you like him over text or in person, without actually saying it.
Prepare Yourself Mentally:
The process of trying to figure out how to tell a guy you‘re into him can be nerve-wracking.
That’s why you have to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally for the first move before anything else.
If you follow this step-by-step guide, you’ll be ready to express your feelings and let this guy know how crazy you are for him in the best possible way.
1. Forget about traditional gender roles
When it comes to dating, relationships, romance, and love life in general, the man is usually the one who’s expected to make the first move.
He’s the one who approaches the girl, asks her out, kisses her first, and should initiate the first s*x.
However, these rules are obviously outdated and are a thing of the past because here you are, wondering how to tell a boy you like him.
As a woman, you want equality in all life aspects, right?
So, why can’t you also sometimes take over the leading role when it comes to dating, instead of always waiting for a guy to do all the work?
It is time to forget about traditional gender divides and take things in your own hands if you want to achieve something.
It is time to figure out how to tell a guy that you like him.
Don’t worry, you won’t embarrass yourself, he won’t think of you as any less of a woman, and you won’t endanger his masculinity for taking the first step.
In fact, this will help you stand out from the rest of the girls and I assure you that, instead of making fun of you, the guy you like will admire your bravery.
Besides, you can’t expect for this man to magically know that you’re into him unless you give some hints.
The last thing you want is to miss a chance with someone you like just because you’re burdened with some ancient stereotypes.
2. Build your self confidence
The next step in the process of getting yourself mentally ready for expressing your feelings to a man is preparing your confidence.
In this situation, your self esteem has to be at its peak.
After all, you’re trying to get this man to like you back, aren’t you? Well, this is something you’ll never manage to achieve unless you start liking and loving yourself first.
You need to convince him that you’re a high quality woman who’s worthy of his time and attention, and in order to do that, you have to become aware of all of your good sides.
You have to start thinking of yourself as the woman of every man’s dreams – as the most beautiful and attractive, the smartest and the most interesting girl that this guy’s ever had the chance of meeting.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you ought to become cocky or self-centred.
In fact, the goal of increasing your self-confidence is for you to stop seeing this man as out of your league and for you to stop considering yourself not good enough for him.
Besides, even if things between you two fail and don’t turn out the way you imagined them to, the progress you made on yourself remains.
Therefore, don’t waste a lot of time focusing on your insecurities and start seeing yourself as the catch you really are.
3. Don’t expect too much
The thing about being in love with someone you never actually had is the fact that you usually idealize this person.
You’ve only seen his good sides and never had the chance to get bored of him.
Well, before doing anything concrete regarding your feelings, you have to take off your rose tinted sunglasses and start perceiving this guy as a human being made of flesh and blood instead of this Mr. Perfect you created in your head.
Once you do this and become aware of his imperfections, you’ll see that getting to him is actually a piece of cake.
I’m not claiming you don’t like him enough, I’m just saying that you think he is the only man you could ever feel this incredible infatuation for because he’s unattainable and unreachable.
There is no point in idealizing your potential romance either. Even if you two do hook up, it won’t be a fairytale.
I assure you that you’ll argue from time to time, that he has some personality traits you don’t like, that sometimes he’ll annoy you, and that there’ll be times in which you’ll want to send him to hell.
All of this is perfectly normal and it happens to all couples, despite the love they share.
However, if you keep on expecting too much of this guy, once you win him over, see his true colors, and your relationship falls into a rut, you’ll just end up disappointed.
4. Be optimistic…
When you build your self confidence, it’s time to get rid of negative thoughts. Instead of picturing the worst case scenario, imagine that things will turn out for the best and that this guy will soon become your boyfriend.
First and foremost, you attract what you fear.
Therefore, there’s a great possibility of your negative, pessimistic energy to chase this man away from you even before you get him for real.
If you see yourself as a loser, that is exactly what you’ll be.
Secondly, negative thoughts won’t bring you anywhere and have no real point.
Things will end up they way they’re destined to be and if you keep on wracking your brains about all the possible outcomes, you’ll just stress yourself out and burden your mind with all of this unnecessary overthinking.
Also, pessimism will increase your anxiety and insecurities.
If you allow the fear of failure to get the best of you, your subconscious will persuade you to give up before you even tried.
5. …but prepare for the worst
However, what is also important is to be prepared for the worst possible case scenario, without being obsessed with it.
Don’t fear rejection and realize that even if this guy tells you NO, it won’t be the end of the world.
It doesn’t mean you’re not meant to be loved or not enough. There is always a tiny chance of him not liking you back and that’s his right, and you shouldn’t blame him for it.
Also, if this happens, the last thing you should do is see this rejection as a personal defeat.
No, you’re not humiliated and you didn’t embarrass yourself for going after what you wanted.
I won’t lie to you. if you get rejected, you’ll certainly feel bad. Nevertheless, it will be his loss, not yours.
You gave your best and you’ll always know you tried. Instead of beating yourself up for it, be proud of your strength and determination.
Besides, remember that everything happens for a reason. So, if it turns out that this guy doesn’t like you back, it simply means you two are not meant to be.
Don’t see it as a failure – see it as a new, valuable experience that helped you learn a lot.
Instead of perceiving all of this as the worst thing that’s ever happened to you, see it as God’s way of saving you – His way of clearing your path for someone better.
Instead of seeing it as a curse, see it as a blessing.
Make some concrete moves:
You might think that all of the above-mentioned steps won’t bring you closer to this man and are just nerve-wracking.
However, mental preparation is actually crucial for what’s coming next.
1. Find out more about his relationship status…
One of the first steps is to find out more about this guy’s love life. After all, you don’t want to be anyone’s mistress and it’s important to find out whether he’s taken or not.
If it so happens that you find out this man is in a relationship or even married, I’m sorry, but sadly, your journey ends here.
As much as you like him, this is a clear sign to give up on him and to turn to someone new.
Be very detailed when it comes to this investigation.
I’m not claiming that this guy is one of those douchebags who’re hiding their wife or girlfriend while they pretend to be bachelors, but it’s always better to be safe than sorry.
After checking whether he’s wearing a wedding ring or not, snoop through his social media profiles and subtly ask your mutual friends about his relationship status.
Don’t worry, you’re not crazy for doing all of this, you’re just making sure that you won’t be interfering in someone’s relationship if you come clean about your feelings.
On the other hand, if you’re certain that he is single, this fact alone doesn’t have to necessarily be a green light for you to start chasing him.
How long has it been since his last serious relationship?
Has he really cut all ties with his past or will you likely find yourself third-wheeling in the middle of an on-and-off relationship that obviously won’t ever end?
Would he respond to your feelings just to make someone jealous?
Would you be his rebound he doesn’t plan on spending a lot of time with, after he gets what he wants?
Is there some emotional baggage he might carry into a relationship? He may be single, but is he emotionally available?
Yes, all of this seems like a lot of work and too much overthinking.
However, it’s better to know these things upfront, before you get yourself dragged into an unwanted situation.
Also, keep in mind that you probably won’t be able to get all the answers you’re looking for.
You won’t get to the bottom of all the details regarding his romantic past, but try finding as much as you can to get the bigger picture.
2. …and whether this guy likes you back
Is there any chance that this guy already likes you back? Maybe he’s also trying to find a way to approach you, but you haven’t been paying attention?
First of all, put an effort into finding out more about the type of girls he prefers.
And I’m not talking about a physical type here only, I’m talking about whether he likes introverted or extroverted girls, if he’s more into the “nice girl” type of prefers the alpha females, and so on.
All of this intel doesn’t serve you to change your ways in order to become more likeable for him.
Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not until you get him, because sooner or later, you’ll have to show your true colors, which will leave this guy feeling deceived.
Instead, knowing more about his exes can only help you see if you fit his type or not.
Remember: Even if you’re completely different to all the girls he’s ever dated, it doesn’t mean he can’t grow to like you, if you two click.
The next thing is to check out the signals he’s been sending you.
Does he maintain eye contact, is he using every opportunity to be near you and have physical contact, does he flirt with you, and how does he respond to your pick up lines?
Keep your eyes wide open and pay attention to his body language because it’s possible that he’ll make the first step, if he just gets a little push from you.
3. Make yourself visible
Before you can expect this man to start liking you, he first has to notice you and become aware of your existence.
Therefore, it’s your job to make yourself visible to him without becoming a pain in the a** in the process.
If he’s your coworker, conveniently start going to lunch breaks at the same time he does, do something to give your supervisors a chance to praise you in front of everyone, or ask him for help.
If he’s your neighbour or someone you often see on the street, make sure you two run into each other as much as possible. If he’s someone you noticed in the gym, start exercising at the same time he does…
On the other hand, if you and this guy don’t have much in common, use some sneaky ways to find out where he spends his free time.
“Accidentally” appear at the club or coffee shop he usually visits, or see if you have some mutual friends who can introduce you to him.
However, make sure he doesn’t notice you doing any of these things on purpose.
Yes, it can be a funny story once you start dating and he’d probably be flattered by the effort you invested in winning him over, but at this point, he’ll only think of you as a stalker and your behavior might chase him away.
4. Look your best
I won’t lie to you – men are visual creatures before anything else.
It means that a guy has to be physically attracted to you before he starts uncovering layers of your personality.
Don’t get me wrong. I bet that you’re an amazing person and that every man would be thrilled to have you as his girlfriend.
However, sadly, he probably won’t give you a chance unless he considers your looks appealing.
After all, I’m sure that this guy’s physical appearance is also one of the reasons you like him so much, so why would he be different?
That’s why you have to look your best every time you think you might run into him.
Nobody expects you to be a top model, but you can put focus on your attributes and have some makeup on.
Also, don’t forget to have clean and nice hair and always smell good.
5. Follow him on social media
If you have trouble letting this guy know how you feel, can’t find a way to get closer to him, and seem to have a problem with running into him face to face, use the benefits of modern technology and approach him online.
Simply send him a friend or follow request on his social media accounts.
Like his pictures, comment on his status updates, watch his stories, and if he has a dating profile like Tinder, don’t forget to swipe right.
Also, this way you two can start some kind of communication – if nothing else, you can always direct message him regarding something he posted.
After you see that the conversation is flowing, try some pick up lines and show your interest in him.
After all, texting a guy you like is much easier than talking to him face to face. He won’t see that you’re nervous or shaking, and you have more time to think of a witty response.
However, make sure you’re not too pushy either. It’s one thing for you to make the first step towards him, but completely different if you send him a text message every few minutes, without any positive feedback.
When it comes to your social media profiles, make sure he can see that you’re single and available and always post photos of yourself looking as gorgeous as possible.
Hide the photos with your ex you still might have on your page, put a hashtag “friend” every time you post a picture with your guy friend, and forget about posting some sad quotes or songs, which might imply that you’re still not over someone from your past.
6. Do something for him
Another thing that might send this man a hint that you like him is doing something nice for him.
Don’t exaggerate with huge romantic gestures and expensive gifts – just show him that you’re there and he can count on you.
Buy him a little something you know he likes, wish him a happy birthday, politely ask him if he needs anything when he’s going through hard times, or do him a favor when he’s in a time of need.
Anything you choose to do will show him that you notice the smaller details about him, you want to make him happy, and you care for his well-being.
Also, don’t hesitate turning to him when you need help during your own hard times.
Remember that men enjoy being the heroes and he’ll probably be thrilled at the fact that you see him as reliable and all too happy to have the chance to help you out.
7. Start talking to him
Sometimes, when you’re trying to get closer to the object of your affection, the hardest thing is to break the ice.
You’re scared that you’ll get tongue-twisted if you try talking to him and just make a fool of yourself.
However, you simply have to start a conversation with this guy, one way or another, if you plan on getting to his heart.
Of course, you won’t approach him out of the blue, telling him you’re into him.
That’s why you have to be patient and wait for an opportunity to talk to him, without looking like a lunatic.
For example, you can ask him for a simple favor, help, or advice, depending on the circumstances and the nature of your relationship.
What’s important here is to plan the conversation in as much detail as you can before saying anything.
If nothing else, practice your opening line and hope that the rest of the talking will flow naturally.
You two will probably start with some irrelevant small talk, but that’ll give you an opportunity for some meaningful, deeper conversation in the future.
When talking to this guy for the first time, do your best to make him laugh. Be witty and interesting and don’t bore him.
Great advice is to end the conversation in the middle of it, to leave him wanting for more.
Also, it would be good to avoid too-serious topics right from the start and rather keep things as casual as possible.
When you want to make a guy like you back, you just have to know how to flirt with him effectively and how to use your body language to your advantage.
The trick is to give him a hint without being too pushy.
For starters, try maintaining eye contact. Stare at him and when he looks at you, smile and don’t look away.
Whenever the two of you are close, make sure to sit next to him. Laugh at his jokes and glance over his mouth when you’re talking.
Every time you two greet, hug him tightly and don’t let go right away.
Kiss him on the cheek or in the corner of his mouth and be attentive to his reaction.
Use every opportunity you can to touch him.
When you’re laughing or making a point, put your hand on his shoulder or knee. This way, his body will get used to yours.
When you two are texting, don’t hesitate to send him some flirty texts. Use kiss and heart emojis and see how he responds!
Whatever you do, pay attention to the feedback you’re getting.
Is he comfortable in your presence and flirting back?
Or he is indirectly yet clearly asking for more personal space and would obviously prefer you to step back?
9. Ask him out
Another way to tell a guy you like him is to ask him out. If you still don’t have enough courage for some big steps, this doesn’t have to be a first date invitation.
It’s enough to ask him on a group get-together with your other friends or coworkers.
You can ask him to join you on the lunch break or to grab a coffee, without implying any deeper meaning.
Another sneaky way you can use here is to get to the bottom of this guy’s interests.
For example, if you find out that he happens to like a certain band or book author, buy tickets to the concert or launch and invite him to come along.
Of course, you won’t honestly tell him just how much effort you put into all of this.
Instead, make it all look like a coincidence. Mention the event and tell him that you’d like to go, but none of your friends want to accompany you.
When he gets surprised that you have common interests and tells you that this is something he likes too, casually mention that you have a spare ticket and ask if he’d like to tag along.
10. Tell him directly
Despite the fact that you show interest in them, there are simply some guys who can’t seem to take the hint.
If your crush is one of them, you have no other choice but to come clean about your feelings and be completely direct.
Maybe he’s convinced that you’re just being kind and don’t see him as more than a nice guy whom you’ll put in the friend zone.
Maybe he’s one of those shy guys who fear rejection or an introvert who fails to notice the obvious signals.
If this is the case, I hate to break it to you, but you’ll have to pluck up the courage and let this guy know how you feel straight up.
Be a grownup and do your dirty work by yourself – don’t even consider, for example, sending your best friend to do the job for you.
When it comes to advice on how to tell a guy you like him in person, the most important things NOT to do are to make a big deal of it, go into details about how long you’ve liked him, and turn this into a pathetic love declaration.
Just express your feelings and ask him out on a first date.
If you have trouble letting this man know how you feel face to face, do it over a flirty text message. Just don’t hesitate in doing it!