Don’t pick up the phone.
It’s the call you’ve been waiting for, isn’t it? It’s the sound you have heard ringing in your sleep for so many nights. It’s your first look at your phone and the hope it’s his number—calling to apologize, to tell you he loves you and wants you back. It’s him and all you’ve been waiting for and you’re fingers are itching to pick up, aren’t they?
But, before you pick up, there is something you need to be aware of.
How many times has he done this to you?
You’ve tried to move on so many times, but somehow he always gets in your way. Either he calls, texts, shows up, or you hear his name in your head and you drop everything. You drop everything waiting for him to spread his arms and welcome you in his hugs, but it isn’t really happening how you’ve pictured it.
He can make you feel like nobody else.
Because you gave him that much power. You’ve allowed him to become so important and you can’t help but want him. But if you gave yourself a week to think about him without your feeling clouding your judgment, things would crystallize a bit.
You’d see he isn’t as special as you thought. He isn’t even average, but you made him perfect and #1. That’s what you do—you give people much more credit than they deserve.
But you keep forgetting what a player he is.
See, whenever he rings you up, you’re the first to show up. You’re like those duty officers that are first to arrive at the crime scene. But, honestly and harshly, that’s all you’ll ever be. There is no higher position for you in his police station.
Don’t let him in.
He is not calling because he’s taking you seriously this time. He’s not calling because he knows you’re worthy. He’s not calling because he wants you to get back together.
He is calling because he needs you like a parasite needs another life to feed on. He needs you to take care of him, to love him and to care for him. He needs your love, your generosity, and your warm eyes. He needs to not be alone now when everybody else has left him. He’s calling because he’s drunk and he’s alone. It’s the same story all over again.
You shouldn’t be flattered by the guy who calls you only when he’s drunk. No, it doesn’t mean he loves you. It means he just needs you, and you’re the only person he knows who will pick up the phone. Instead, you should be flattered with a grown-a** man who’s not afraid to call you when he’s sober, treat you right, and give you the love you deserve.
You’re constantly preventing yourself from getting over him.
Each time he calls, your heart skips a beat. Each time you see his name on your screen, it makes you want to scream out of joy. He doesn’t deserve it. Remember how many nights you have spent dry-heaving out of desire for him?
How many times have you lay on the floor wishing the pain was gone and that you had never met him? How many times have you wanted to erase him from your memory? And yet, it takes just one call from him to make you forget all the pain and all the life-regretting tears you let fall down for him.
Somebody needs to tell you that practice makes perfect.
It might kill you now not to pick up, but later he will only be a random name on the screen eventually.
I promise he won’t know you wanted and waited for him to call. He won’t know how much you miss him. Nobody will ever tell him how much you’re hurting. But he’ll think you’re doing just fine without him and that there is no place for him in your life. Eventually, it will be so. He doesn’t need to know it’s different now.
Afterward, he’ll realize what has he lost. He’ll be aware that he treated you the way nobody should ever be treated and he’ll regret all the times he ignored you, manipulated you, and made you feel bad about yourself. He’ll keep calling the only person who loved him for who he was, but you’ll just let it ring. Because, sooner or later, there will be somebody who’ll treat you better than him. There will be somebody who’ll give you the love you deserve—and it’s not him.
He doesn’t deserve to hear your voice.