Immediately after a toxic relationship is over, you feel as though you are all out of strength. You feel both emotional and physical exhaustion and you feel like it’s only going to get worse.
Luckily, that feeling is fleeting. It’s just the first phase of your healing process and things do get better. As time goes by, you learn you are stronger than you ever gave yourself credit.
There was nobody else coming to save you from all that pain and it was all in your hands. You had no other option but to become your own hero.
These are 7 superpowers of people who survived a toxic relationship.
1. Identifying red flags
A toxic relationship is something you wouldn’t want to repeat. Your past experience taught you what love should never look like. It taught you to recognize the signs of toxic behavior.
You learned to take things slowly. Your eyes are wide open and even when you fall in love again, you will be able to see that other person with more clarity.
2. Letting go of what’s not meant for you
When you look back, you realize that what was holding you on to him was hope above everything else. Hope that your love would change him and that things would get better. Sadly, they never did.
Things only got worse. The whole situation scared you so much that you feel that you can never trust anybody again. You are scared that history will repeat itself and that your heart will be broken again.
But somewhere down the line, you decided that you have to regain your power. You couldn’t allow toxic love to win. You learned to take risks and allow other people into your life.
You learned to let go of everything that’s not meant for you, past and present.
Being able to let go was a big part of the process of falling in love with yourself all over again.
Your toxic love made you doubtful and insecure and it ruined your self-esteem.
You had to let go of those negative emotions too. Brick by brick, you rebuilt yourself and you are still a work in progress. As you are learning to love yourself more, things in your life are getting better.
You realized that your needs matter too. That all that attention, love and care you gave him you actually owe yourself.
4. Being more empathetic and compassionate
You relate to people who have been through similar things as you and you feel for anyone with any kind of hardship. You do your best to listen to them, give them your advice and offer any kind of help they need.
You turned all the bad things that happened to you into something good. Instead of being bitter and mad, you decided to be a better person, a person filled with empathy and compassion.
5. Knowing what you should never settle for
Maybe you still don’t know what you want but you definitely know what you don’t want. You are not the person you used to be—your mindset changed.
You still believe in love but you won’t tolerate being treated badly because of it. You know that love shouldn’t hurt you in any way. So you stopped making excuses for half-a**ed men.
You know what you deserve and you want to be treated like that. You want investments, respect, trust, and love and you are not settling for anything less.
You are way stronger than before and it’s because of everything that happened to you. You took all those shattered pieces and put them back together piece by piece.
Now you know that no matter how many times you fall, you will always be able to lift yourself up again. Surviving a toxic relationship was a test of strength and you passed with flying colors.
Forgiving doesn’t mean being OK with everything that happened. It doesn’t mean getting in contact with or having any form of socialization with your ex. It means to dismiss all those thoughts from your mind.
There is no point in keeping resentments alive and being mad at them. It will only make your life bitter. Karma will catch up with them anyway. And you know that now. So in a way, you forgave them to be able to leave them in the past.
Also, you forgave yourself for staying longer than you should have and for putting up with their toxicity for so long. You didn’t know better at the time. Luckily you know now and you decided to be more gentle and forgiving toward yourself too.