Relationships between men and women are often fraught with difficulties! While for a woman, saying no to someone is considered “violence”, for a man … Well, it’s one of the sexiest things ever!
The good news is that now that you know it, you can use this completely counter-intuitive fact to your advantage. We will see why and how you will be able to make it an asset in your seduction!
The nice girl syndrome
The nice girl syndrome devastates relationships full of future … This is one of the worst scourges of our love life! When we meet a man, we are still a bit on the defensive. We gauge him, we wait to see how he will try to seduce us and we keep our critical mind awake …
Then everything changes. That’s it, he made our conquest, we lowered the guard and our attitude changes completely. We think of him from morning to evening, we watch our phone while waiting for his small SMS … And we rhythm our lives according to our appointments with him.
No more girlfriends, outings, yoga, weekend hikes … It becomes the center of our lives and all the rest loses its flavor.
The problem is that your man, what he liked was when you were a little distant, a little on the reserve, impertinent, teases … When you had to conquer in short …
The man is a hunter
The way in which men and women work, especially in love, is so different that it often gives rise to great misunderstandings.
As we have already seen in a previous article, the man is a hunter who needs to pursue you to keep his interest awake.
On the contrary, women seek to create a stable and committed relationship as soon as possible, as soon as they have chosen a partner. They refocus their needs on their nascent couple to create the cocoon that will secure them.
It is therefore often at this stage of the relationship, when the woman switches to “couple” mode, that one loses the man. He is not there yet and finds himself “caged”.
That’s why we women have to force ourselves to slow down. We must respect each other’s and stay a little longer than we would like in the “seduction” mode of the beginnings.
Even if you do not like it and it seems completely counter-intuitive, you have to play the game of cat and mouse to continue to attract a man.
To know how to say no to a man
And here we come to the heart of the subject. To say “no” to a man is one of the most attractive things in his eyes. You do not believe me ?
Remember when you started your relationship, when he went out of his way to conquer you and you sent him out on any occasion?
And had he retired from the competition? Not at all ! On the contrary, he was coming back again! And took pleasure in making sure to return to your good graces.
I’m not telling you to mistreat your man, but look at how men are between them! They go to bed, they insult each other gently, they jostle each other, and that’s how they strengthen their bonds.
We women, we need to watch over each other, to make him feel good, in a serene and positive atmosphere. We need to express our feelings and create emotional connections.
But at the beginning of the relationship, a man needs a little challenge, and you must not give him everything.
Concretely, what is it to say no to a man?
Say no, for example:
Setting limits …
… when your man says or does things that you do not like. Men love women who respect themselves, who have principles and who know how to impose their values.
Be careful, I’m not telling you to put limits by scolding , because that, men hate … You must say things assertively, calmly. By explaining what may have disappointed or disturbed you and without criticizing or pointing to the other.
As we have seen enough, men and women work in a very different way, and it is sometimes good to give their instructions clearly to the other …
Do not build your schedule around your availability …
… to him. For example, do not shift or cancel an appointment to see it. There again, there will be nothing more attractive to him than knowing that your life does not revolve around him. And that you resist him a little …
If he calls at 17h to set a rendezvous the same evening, the nice girl will cancel the drink organized long time with his girlfriends … To see all business ceasing.
So you must not be that nice girl. Tell him that you are busy and can not, and wait until he proposes a new date. He will wonder why this appointment is more important than him in your eyes. Did he really conquer you?
Do not agree to sleep right away with him …
… the nice girl think she will lose her man if she refuses to have sex with him at the 3 rd or 4 th meeting.
Again, it’s all wrong! To make him wait will arouse his desire to court you to convince you.
Especially since this will give you the opportunity to create an emotional connection with him in this phase where he is very receptive.
All that being said I must make you a concession. I have the nice girl syndrome myself and it’s hard to say no to a man. And I’m not saying that it’s easy, far from it, but little by little, by becoming aware of this phenomenon and by forcing itself to impose its limits, we are able to improve its relations and to increase its potential of attraction.