You have noticed for some time tensions within your couple. You doubt your feelings and do not know which foot to dance on.
Transient crisis or alarm signal of a more serious problem?
Deciding to end your relationship is extremely difficult. We spend our time raising the pros and the cons by exhausting the brain.
How do we know if we have to do everything to save our couple, or, on the contrary, put an end to it once and for all?
1. It’s time to break up and you’ve been thinking about it for a while
We all have small moments of discouragement or periods of conflict more or less repetitive.
To make your relationship last a long time is sometimes not easy!
But if you catch yourself thinking, “I should have dumped it a long time ago” or “really, nothing’s going right between us,” take the measure of these reflections.
One of my friends, Sandra, understood that things had definitely changed between her and her boyfriend Marc after a trivial observation.
His heart was no longer pounding when the name “Marc” appeared on the screen of his cell phone … quite the contrary, it almost irritated him systematically.
Same thing when they found themselves somewhere after work. Six months ago, she would have pumped, excited to have a romantic evening with her darling.
Now, it swelled to meet up with Marc and did not know what they were going to talk about …
Is this a thought that is familiar to you?
Also, if you happen to consider your life without him, single, do you surprise yourself to imagine it light, this life?
Do you see yourself as relieved and liberated from a weight, not to say a ball ?!
If so, do not overdo it and make the right decision.
And after all, being single , it has its good sides …!
2. It’s time to break up because it’s been a while since you’re not happy
Happiness is the key element to guarantee a future for any relationship. But also as an individual.
If you feel that you are no longer satisfied with the way your relationship has been for a while (of which only you are a judge), ending it seems the right thing to do.
In any case, remember that one person will never be able to make another happy if it is not first happy and fulfilled …
It is our duty to ourselves to feel serene on a daily basis, and to strive for balance and fulfillment as best we can.
If a person obstructs this pursuit of well-being, it has no place in our lives.
3. You look at other men with interest
Whereas before – when you were crazy in love – you found all the guys that you think are faded , or you do not even look at them, well, that’s not the case anymore.
Not only do you find that all these guys on your way have taken a lot of good looks, but still, you find yourself flirting!
Oh dear !
Then, little by little, you pay more attention than usual to your dress to be sexier, you do not forget to go out without makeup …
In short, you want to please.
And you start to fantasize gently on this or that guy.
Nothing wrong or strange about that!
It’s a very innocent way of escaping mentally from the situation that you live with your companion and that weighs you down.
Your couple makes you suffer, you are bored, you suffocate and you need to escape … for the moment innocently. Nothing more normal.
You notice that you have changed
You may have matured faster than your boyfriend,
for some reason X or Y.
It may also be that you no longer have the same aspirations and goals.
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry wrote: To love is not to look at each other, it is to look in the same direction.
A couple can only work if everyone stays true to himself.
Now, if the future your man envisions is completely different from the one you dream of, it must be objectively taken into account.
My physio told me that she separated from her first husband because at 39, she wanted a child, and he did not … yet.
He constantly pushed back the possibility of starting a family to start his business first and foremost.
Their goals were therefore incompatible.
Although she loved him, she decided to end her marriage. She put her interests before her husband and was right!
One of her patients, well settled professionally, having learned of her divorce, invited her without waiting for dinner. They are not left and have had a baby soon!
What I want to tell you is that sometimes you have to be coldly realistic and objective in looking at what you expect from life, and if the person who is by your side right now will help you or not to achieve your desires .
Of love or friendship ?
Yes, even Celine Dion has gone through this dilemma … “he alone can decide that we talk about love or friendship . “
False, Celine! We also have our say.
It can be difficult to understand if your love is more than a sincere friendship.
Do not make the mistake of staying with him by living in the past, thinking about the wonderful memories you shared, the romantic weekends and other moments of intimacy.
Some people stay in a relationship with their partner so as not to lose their friendship.
But if your link is so strong, the friendship relationship will survive.
On the other hand, after years of routine and daily cohabitation, it is not surprising that things are less olé-olé than at the beginning.
Do not immediately conclude that love is no more. If you have the will to make efforts, it is quite possible to seduce your man even after years of relationship!
What’s important is that you really listen to how you feel.
Do not ignore any feeling of discomfort that you may feel when you come into contact with your companion.
Do not stay with him for the wrong reasons, and do not hang around too much.
All this time when you stay in his company is wasted time that you will not spend with the man really made for you.
To find out if you have to end your story, just see what you would answer to the following three questions:
- Can you imagine the future without him?
- Could you be happy without him in life?
- Does it still bring you what you expect?
Answer in all honesty. It’s about your happiness that it’s about …